#2 - Sleep

Sleep is the recreational drug of choice for medical students. The amygdala determines it is a positive stimulus and craves more as it is metabolized to its byproducts. Students all cope in different ways - some binge, others become daily users.

The professors are no doubt the bosses in the cartel. They empower us with knowledge about sleep- describing in depth the 5 different stages, the neuronal action potentials, and the source of sleep spindles and delta waves from pacemaker cells. The recipe is quick - 90 minutes/cycle, melatonin to naturally speed it up, or using some smuggled Ambien from Sanofi-aventis will do the trick.

As good foot soldiers, we are not supposed to actually partake in the final product, but only distribute as ordered. I am sure some of us sneak in a few without paying, perhaps that explains the disappearance of colleagues as the years go on. However, when we do sneak it in, we cannot even enjoy the pure product.

Our brains toss and turn trying to analyze the questions on the exam while the insensitive neighbors are watching TV, playing loud music, and exercising on their treadmills with a rhythmic thump. Finally, just as consciousness slips away, the phone rings or the pager buzzes, and the high instantly disappears. Maybe, just maybe, one day, we too can become the heads of a cartel, mixing our own formula, spreading the drug one prescription at a time.